Of course, that could be just existential bullshit. However, why do people get into depression? Why do they lack the motivation after a while? Why does their form dip so much they start to doubt themselves? No, why do they get bored. That's the word. Bored. You get so bored and frustrated and annoyed and whatever other word like apathetic, and you lose your way. Simple as that. What do you to change yourself? Crazy stuff.
You shave your head. You get a tattoo. You go on a diet, either to get skinny or to get fat, you're not judgmental. You move to a different town, or country, or even a continent. You travel the world.
Sometimes, and on rare occasions, you don't know what to do. You simply quit your job and stay in bed for hours upon days, without showering, barely eating.
I know what I'm going to do. I'm on the bridge right now, about to go up. I hope the water's fine. If I'm not, I might not surface. Hmm...