Tuesday, 31 December 2013
"My dear chap. This has been our most fruitful year."
"Aye, gov, aye. We've had, what? Ten of them?"
"Eleven, with this one."
"Aye. He's too fresh and I forgot."
"Naughty boy. Too much juice does that for ya."
"Aye. Especially red."
"Now let's cross 'im off the list. Blond with rosy cheeks and cleft teeth in front. Do you wager he'll fetch a pretty penny?"
"Aye. If the coppers will not find us."
"They dare not. After all, we are protected."
"Aye, gov, aye. Live long and prosper."
Friday, 27 December 2013
I moved in here three weeks ago hoping I'll grow as a person. However, things didn't go at all like that.
Day, night, it doesn't matter when, two mirrors high atop a tower that's ten feet away from my apartment light me up.
Their brightness seeps through the window, shades, even cardboard stand, and burns me.
I've been to the hospital twice, to get a check-up. Health deteriorated between visits. Probably since then, too. I haven't had the money to go a third time. Eyes are shot.
Heard the last owner died.
Shotgun and shells are in closet. Better use
You're the one who told me to create, right?
Then why are you yelling at me for no reason?
What's that? I blew up the ecosystem and now there's only one big ball left?
I'll make a new Earth there, a different one. Maybe even better.
Unacceptable? Hah. You're one to talk since you messed up the original Earth and left the people without any hope.
Oh, oh... Now you deny it you wily fool. That's why they stopped believing in you. That's why I have to build a new one.
You want to make one, again? Sure, I guess. There's always room for aliens, right?
Mine'll be the aliens? Fine. They'll be better anyway. Without a poop hole and defects, they'll be the perfect creatures.
Ah... Can't wait till mine conquer the world and yours will sulk without a reason.
The theme was the picture on the left, while I had to incorporate the one on the right somewhere.
Wednesday, 25 December 2013
As the first jingles ran through his cotton earmuffs
and his nose drooped like an icepack about to melt,
he popped up his black eyes and jiggled his oval head.
“Shoo, you darn birds. Get off.” He lashed out
fog from his lipless mouth and scared them away.
“Another winter, another chill. Lonely times
sure do come fast, but only once a year.”
He rotated his round body to a tree and picked up
a muddied, bent cardboard piece. He rolled it
into a cone and scooped snow from the pile beside him.
“Nothing beats nectar,” he smiled as he took a bite.
This little tidbit appeared in the anthology "Twas the Night Before." A collection of 100-word drabbles about the festive spirit.
You can read the rest below.
Twas the Night Before
Thursday, 19 December 2013
The sparkling blue water graces me with its presence. So fun to be alive and roam freely. No barriers. No walls. Not even bretheren.
Wait... There's a sound coming from the west. Maybe I should... It stopped. What gives?
Bah. Must've been a seagull. Bloody things always disturb me when I'm sleeping.
Now where was I? Right. Basking in this jovial sun. Cheeky guy is smiling at me in full effect.
Something just grabbed me. I can feel how it pulls me away, yet, as much as I struggle, I can't seem to get loose.
What's this sharp thing I...
100 words for this week's Friday Fictioneers
Tuesday, 17 December 2013
Christmas cookie, oh, Christmas cookie
Crisply burnt, but turned the other way
Appealing to the Santa, who'll bite.
Then he'll down the glass of milk beside
Asleep to fall, for the final time.
For this week's Trifextra
Saturday, 7 December 2013
"Why'd you have to dazzle me?"
"I'm surprised you can see since you're myopic."
"There's a flicker near my eye sockets. Stop it."
"You're no fun. Gonna blind the tortoise in the basin."
For Trifecta's challenge. Had to use "myopic," "dazzle" and "basin".
Aunt Renie is a peach of a gal.
She dances rumba like no other.
Drinks anything, but only two glasses.
"My limit, deary."
Despite her frail physique,
She is stronger than girls
A quarter her age.
"I was born to see the world."
And shows us her tickets.
From Amsterdam to Paris to Bucharest
All visited in less than a week.
Then tells us of her regret.
"That my best friend passed away,
And didn't get to see the sea.
But with this water from the Mediterranean
It's as if she came along."
And off she goes,
To her next destination.
"Brazil, to see the Rio Festival."
Friday, 6 December 2013
This weeks theme for Friday Fictioneers
I know it says "no trespassing," but maybe I should go over the wall.
No, no, no. What am I talking about? Last time I stepped on a man's property, he ran me off with his shotgun. Almost left me headless.
Yeah. But that's how old goats are.
True. Still, there are mad dogs beyond.
That's why I'm armored to the teeth and have a baton. Just in case.
If five mutts jump me, I won't be able to withstand it, well-knit leather suit or no.
So, I should go away and be a coward?
No. I'm the hero.
Wednesday, 4 December 2013
Oh, my poor buttocks.
It was fine yesterday, but today...
I itched and scratched at it all morning, yet it wouldn't go away.
Not after a bath, nor after sauna.
Now I have a rash the size of a watermelon all over my lovely tush.
Can't even sit to drink my tea.
Oh, Sweet Lips. You said your soap was crab free.