Tuesday, 6 October 2015

Story #42 - Trying too hard to be funny

"Hey, Billy. Hey... Check out that kid."
Billy stops licking his popsicle. "Which one?"
"With the red t-shirt that "Huu-Hah" on it."
"Looks like a bellend to me."
"Everybody looks like a bellend to you. Probably you, too."
"Screw you."
"Alright. Let's go to him."
"For shits and giggles."
"What, you think licking a bloody ice cream stick is more worthy of your time?"
"It's sweeter."
"Oh, come on. I'll buy you a new one if you don't enjoy yourself. It's sweeter..."
Billy shrugs and continues on with his iced delight, as both of them go towards the person.
"Hiya, mate. How's it going?"
"Fine," the guy says, looking at them with half opened eyes.
"Rough night?"
"Don't feel like chatting, are ya?"
"Not really."
"Okay. I'll just ask ya one thing."
"What's that?"
"Huu-hah...huu-hah. What's that all about?"
"Kinda like that Al Pacino bit, but not really."
"Never heard of him?"
"I only watch Youtube."
"You should know Scarface."
"No. I watch viral videos. And kittens playing. That type of stuff."
"Right. If you don't know, then you don't know."
"Huh-hah... Sounds funny, mate."
"Sure. I'm going now."
Billy was on the other side. Him and his friend stopped.
"Dammit. I wanted to be funny and I failed. Let's go home."
"You said you'd buy me another one."
"Fine. I hope it's bitter, this one."
"You should buy one yourself while you're at it. Maybe you can actually make a joke next time."

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